Welcome Back, JayCee. . . 'A Merry Christmas Newsletter' and A MOVE!

I know, I know. . . I haven't posted in forever. And most of my life (relationship included) has changed so VERY drastically. I'm not ready to talk about it on this blog. . . in fact, let's just drop that bomb now (if there's anyone still reading the bombs!):

I'M MOVING.

I'm going to be moving this blog. . . and I'm NOT going to link from this page to that.

If you WANT the new blog address, please email me (from the "about me" / "contact" page) and I'll give you the new address.

So, for your reading please while you're deciding if you want to email me for the new address, here's the Christmas letter I wrote about the year that Carrot and I have had!

"Happy Holidays from our Family to Yours!"

Happy 2009! Carrot and I would like to welcome you into our lives (although, if you’re reading this, I’d like to think you’re already a very, VERY important part of our lives on a very regular basis!).
I skipped the 2008 update because Carrot and I had SOOOO much going on. I’ll start by recapping the year, briefly, but I’ll definitely go into Carrot’s accomplishments in 2009 in MUCH more detail.
Sit back, relax, and enjoy. . .

"2008"

We moved back to Kansas from California at the end of the summer of 2008. I immediately started Carrot at a home daycare because I already had a job as a CSR / Executive Assistant at a office supply company. We moved back in with my Mom on what we hoped would be a very temporary basis! Close to my birthday, my company had to downsize, causing me to have to look for a job. And also postponing the possibility of a move into our own place.
And I found HT, Inc. WHAT a company!! I am still working for HT, a software (and accompanying hardware) company which services Rent-to-Own and Payday Loan companies. We just celebrated our twenty-fifth anniversary as a company!! We service companies all over the country and in Guam, the Virgin Islands, etc. At HT I do billing reports for all our clients, edit the call tickets that our CS technicians write, and answer the phones when necessary—although I avoid that last task whenever possible! :-)
About the same time, Carrot’s daycare provider’s family had several health emergencies and I decided that I should get her enrolled in a daycare CENTER.
And I started searching. . .

"______ Child Care Center"

I had looked at ______ Child Care Center during a brief stay in Wichita before. And I’m glad I did, because I absolutely LOVE Carrot’s school!! Miss K and Miss E are Carrot’s teachers, and Miss D is the Director. As we’re all “friends” on Facebook (whoo hoo!) and have each other’s email addresses programmed, we keep in touch and send pictures throughout the day! :-)
Carrot is in the Blue Room and learns three things each week: a letter, a number, and a theme (a “God theme” that also translates to a “community theme”).
Her school’s Christmas Pageant is coming up—December 10th—and I can’t wait to see her sing WITH her classmates! We’ll be attending that at the Zoo.
She learns a new song EVERY DAY, and my favorite is (repeating each line twice): “I am special / Look and see / I am very special / God made me!” She also LOVES spirit chants—yay spirit week!

"Our Greatest Accomplishments"

The fall of 2009 I restarted college! And I’ll pause for applause. . . tee hee. . . I am currently enrolled in the Bachelor’s of Social Work program. I was just accepted (it’s not a rigorous acceptance, but it’s also not EASY). I LOVE being back in school. . . pretty much every minute in class and doing homework has been gratifying. Mostly, it’s fabulous being BACK in school after being out for “so long.”

Carrot is learning to write / recognize letters. So far, her best two are ‘C for Carrot’ and ‘M for Mommy’ -- can’t lie; I LOVE that! She’s also becoming adept with B, C, E, F, G and O. She’s learning more each and every day.

Other things Carrot loves: nail polish; coloring; writing the letter ‘A;’ baths (as long as you don’t try to wash her hair!); the TV show ‘Yo Gabba Gabba;’ and hugs, kisses, and ‘loves.’ She’s a VERY loving toddler.

Carrot rides a bike! She has several bikes with training wheels (one for each “house of grandmas”), and I can barely keep her OFF of it!

"2010--More to Come!"

In late December or early January Anna and I will be moving to a new place—an apartment here in northwest Wichita. I can’t wait to share that address (and pictures) with you all!
Anna will be moving up at school—and it’ll be interesting to see what THAT brings with it.
I just received a promotion of sorts—there will be more responsibility, greater pay, and a lot of learning.
Can’t WAIT to see what 2010 brings!!!!

Shoot me email addresses and I'll shoot you my blog's new address. . . can't wait to get reaccquainted with you!!

Update . . . in Bullets (and Thrown Beer Cans)

a brief update. . .

• I had an open, full beer can thrown at me (my car) at 7am on a highway in downtown Wichita by a man in a 350 Ford with American flags flying and Vietname war emblems on his rear window. . . apparently, it's NOT appropriate or polite to use a turn signal anymore. Okay, I won't.
• Baby Carrot is going to start dance lessons (tap and ballet--just like MOMMY did!) in early October. She was so excited about school "Tap and Tumble Time" that I signed her up right away!
• ExHubby "de-friended" me on Facebook.
• I am going to be accepted to the School of Social Work (at my university) and into the Big Brothers Big Sisters program here shortly.
• Shocker and I celebrated 6 months (well, our anniversary came and went-- we'll celebrate this weekend) and moved Carrot's bedroom furniture into his house. . .
• I have a craving for skittles.
• I have a huge deadline for work (due yesterday) and a 5-page paper for school (due tonight) . . . which should I complete???

Ahhh, I'm tired and lethargic today. . .

I need a glass of wine and a hug. Any takers?! Ah, nevermind. . . I'd better offer to Shocker first! :-)

Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned. . .

Well *I* haven't. Per se. . .

I slept with a straight woman. It happens right?! I mean, I'm bi (leaning more toward the male side on 99% of days--- don't tell my boyfriend that; he might get pissed that it's not 100% although I'd remind him that some days he "acts like a girl" so I really, technically lean HIS WAY all the time . . . this whole train of thought is silly; I'm done) ---but at ONE point I was only thinking about men. It was a long time ago, but it still exists. At one point I called myself . . . gasp . . . straight.

Well, HOMEGIRL (let's call her . . . Cougar. [PS. She's 48]) and I went out for drinks. We hugged the minute she walked into the door, drank our drinks and left. All in less than 25 minutes.
We got to her house, poured more drinks . . . and . . .

Wait, did I mention that Cougar has never been with a woman?!
Well, she HADN'T.

I DO like to break 'em in . . . and that's a male AND female reference! I'm feeling predatory today; that Shocker better look out (I'm 'sleeping over' tonight!)

Anyway, she got me a drink, we barely flirted and then I showed her my tattoo (ANNND my matching bra and panty set; she shoots --she scores!) . . . and the woman got downright AGGRESSIVE. She pulled my skirt all the way down, touched my tattoo and then slid her hand around the front of me. 3 minutes later, I was naked. And 3 minutes after that, we were upstairs --- with sex toys, alcohol, and the lights on.

She was loud, very vocal about what she wanted done to her and what she wanted to do to me, very bossy . . . and about an hour later, I was walking down the stairs naked. We were both fully satisfied.
She leaned against her wall with her arms folded, watched me get dressed, and made me say that I would be back soon to do it again.

I got pulled over (a bit tipsy) on the way home with expired tags and an out of state driver's license (and I've lived here for over a year) . . . NO TICKET. That's another story though . . . I'll call it: "Handcuff Me Softly."


Cue: sweet music as the sun rises, then the *ding* of a text message.
She feels she crossed a moral boundary that she didn't know she had; she feels the need to confess; she says she isn't judging ME (and still loves the fantasy OF me), but feels like what SHE DID was wrong; she had the best orgasm of her life, etc. And she wants to know if we can still be friends-- and share sex stories over drinks.

Of course we can, sweet little straight girl . . . but I'm only going to share the sex-capades of Shocker and I. The girl on girl stuff . . . I'll be keeping for myself! :-)

"Pink Buzzy Thing"

On Sunday, I made Carrot lay down in my bed. . .
"You don't have to take a nap," I told her, "but you DO have to REST!"

She smiled (which I fully understood meant that I was going to have my hands full all afternoon) and agreed.
I went to get ready, washed my hair, etc.
I kept checking on her, but she was going exactly what she was supposed to be doing: laying in bed, quietly. She was singing to herself, but hadn't moved even an inch.

I went back to the bathroom.


I HEARD the buzzing before I even turned around. . . and my heart sunk.

"Mommy," she started (both hands clasped around my buzzing pink vibrator), "I don't like this pink buzzy thing on my back OR on my stomach; it tickles too much."

"Carrot! Don't play with that!"

"Why? It's just for Mommies?"



OMG. . . someone needs to find a better hiding spot.

I don't blog enough anymore to be of any use at all . . . which

I don't blog enough anymore to be of any use at all . . . which is why NO ONE comments anymore (save Nancy Pants, who comments with some regularity) . . . PGALC, read this and comment. At least once. And I'll feel more obligated to write more frequently. :-)

I start college --AGAIN-- tonight. I am nervous about going back. I'm not sure that I'm going to like being around shit-head freshmen (even in the HALLWAYS) again. And shit-head freshman boys are the worst . . . with the exception of just a few guys, I didn't even like college-age guys when I was a college-age girl. And I met and married (well, eventually) ExHubby b/c those stupid 19 year old men were so . . . stupid.

Good thing I have Shocker or I might find myself married to an asshole again (just because I enrolled in school).
The way it stands, I get to be enrolled in school (Social Work, btw), take classes, ignore the smelly boys in sweats, and go home to either my prince charming or my darling little princess (depending on the week--and whether or not Carrot is staying with Gma) . . .

And damn, I'm lucky.



"Do you know that with all I have left in my very last breath I will call your name?"
(one of "those songs"--- it's just STUCK in my head!)

Next Thing: Wedding Dress

Ha!! I bet you thought that was FOR ME, didn't you?!?!?!

Not yet, friendly reader. Not yet.
THIS TIME I'm doing my best to not rush. . . which means we:

• decided NOT to move in with each other right away-- I'll have my own apt for a while
• have a very stable form of birthday control-- NOT 'anal' or 'pulling out and spraying wildly hoping it does / doesn't land on Billy Graham's face'
• spend several nights a week together and usually at least one or two of those is overnight-- but we ceratainly have our own activities too (mine are Facebook, snooping, and reading smut all while drinking wine and his activities mostly consist of video games and working out. . . but HEY, they're OUR. OWN. ACTIVITIES! lol)
• are spending some more time with each other's families, which has been very informative and a lot of fun actually

It's been good, but NO WEDDING DRESS YET. . . for ME.


But MY DARLING CARROT is another story. She started preschool. . . and that's actually way far away from wedding dress shopping. . . not the point.
This is all SOOOO weird. It feels like just yesterday I was pregnant and trying to figure out how best to walk so I wouldn't topple over. I very vividly remember learning to breast feed her--which I thought would be a walk in the park, but. . . with HER. . . definitely wasn't. I remember the first date I went on after (which was the first time I left her). . . and I cried through the whole thing. The first time I paddled her butt with my hand. . . the time I caught her standing in the dishwasher. . . when we got Precious, the kitty, & how she used to squeeze the daylights out of her. . . when we got Shadow, the puppy, & how she followed him around constantly. . . moving to CA. . . moving back to KS. . . how, in the first month after we were home, she'd cry for Daddy--until she saw that it made ME cry too. . .
I remember. . .
when she had BLACK hair. . . when she colored on my mom's couch with Sharpie. . . when we first slept over (and she first saw her OWN BED) at Shocker's. . .

Man, I'm A LUCKY Momma.
Gotta share my FAVORITE pictures from her first 3 days at school:



She absolutely WOULD NOT let go of my leg. . . which is SOOOO unlike her!!




This was her "first actual full day of preschool outfit" . . . SOOOO SWEET!!




And finally, Carrot and her Momma. . . I LUUUUHHRRVVE this picture of us together! We both look just slightly 'out of it,' but ya can't change THAT! :-)

Busy Girl----aka, I 'had' a MAN on Sun, a WOMAN on Mon

We (the boyfriend and I) have "an agreement." Let's start with that. . .

If you have read my blog before or followed me on Twitter, you might have caught that I'm bi. I don't NECESSARILY advertise it "in real life," but I don't lie about it either. . . ie, if someone asked me (which, they HAVE), I tell 'em. . . pretty much. Ya know, I am who I am and I like what I like.
What-ev.

but back to our arrangement!
Shocker doesn't mind if I play around with women on the side. It's actually kinda shocking considering that he's never been with a woman that was so . . . well, sexually adventurous AND honest about it.

I straight-up said (at the beginning) something about BEING bi, but not NEEDING to be "a practicing bisexual." It's fun, it's sexy, it's pleasurable. But it's not mandatory.
But he's NEVER even hinted that he didn't like it.
In fact, he's now expressed a desire to, at some point, WATCH me with a woman.


The night before last (two nights ago) was a Shocker and I night. . .
And we had mind-blowing marathon sex (which I believe is a phrase that I straight up copied from my bestie, PGALC) . . . and it was good.
We started in the hot tub, moved inside, were on a couch, on a bed, on the floor with a blanket. He used his mouth, used his fingers, and of course use that other thing that I love SOOOOO much about him.
I used my vibrator, threw around dirty talk, and didn't even have to beg him to pull my hair.
hot.
VEEERRRRY fucking hot.

And then comes the girl on girl time. . .
VEEERRRRY interesting.

There's a woman at work (a temp) who I was SURE I had caught staring at my legs, my ass several times. She (uh. . . Queenie) made all sorts of excuses to stop by my desk. I'd give her "the smile," and she'd blush a little, but not look away. Probably a good 3 months ago, on her last day on the project in my office, I walked over to HER right before leaving for lunch. . .

ME "Hey, I heard that this was the last day for all you temps. . . I just wanted to give you my number. Really, give me a call sometime, girl."
QUEENIE [eyes wide open] "oh, oh, okay."

And then I walked away, shaking my butt just a little more than usual (which I usually did when I knew she was watching.
Glanced back. . .
And she was definitely watching. Smiling.

We started texting and I dove right in. This may have been the first time in my life I was so INTENTIONALLY aggressive in pursuing a woman--and I'd never pursued one I didn't KNOW was bi too.
Didn't take too long before she was volunteering sexual info, pictures. . .
Signed, sealed, delivered.


By the time last night (1 night ago) rolled around, we'd very intimately discussed sex, what we were looking for, what we like in bed, each other's bodies, etc.
and last night was pretty much a sure thing.

And it was also a GOOOOOOD thing.
Although she'd kissed girls, it was her first time WITH one. And she did well.
We didn't go into the oral territory yet, but we talked afterward---and that's definitely the next step!

she was a quick learner (ie, when you're WITH a woman, you usually touch her in a way that would feel good to YOU. . . but she quickly picked up on what was making me move and moan).
I didn't get to experience as many amazing orgams as I had with shocker (or, well. . . ANY, but it WAS her first time and I didn't mind "helping her out"), but it was still GREAT sex. Period.



So, I had sex almost every day for several weeks (first while Mom was out of town, and we were house-sitting and second while Stepmom was out of town, and we were AGAIN house-sitting). . .
and now I'm MISSING IT.

Like, so much that I wore a dress yesterday so I could touch myself WHENEVER I wanted to. . . and so Shocker could grab my ass in the elevator at work.
I LOOOVVVE having a job where I get to work with my boyfriend!